Is Soft Girl Szn Fake?

September 14, 2022

We’ve all seen the captions, “Soft Girl Szn.” I’m here for it. This is for the girls who do a lot of work and then feel it at the end of the day. Or the girl who’s been carrying other peoples’ emotional loads and burdens. Or maybe you just have been super rough on yourself, by thoughts, words or deeds. Or maybe you want to travel. Shout out to you for embracing this trend that hopefully turns into an actual positive lifestyle change.

Well I can say I think that this soft girl szn trend is very relevant.

I’ve seen a lot of “I’m doing what makes me happy this season and cutting off people who don’t suit my life and traveling.”

While that may fit for some I think we can take a different approach to this trend. I saw a post (that I currently can’t find) which spoke on Soft Girl Szn lulling us into a false sense of reality where girls treat themselves to expensive meals, travel, etc. And I agree that that may be a little far fetched for some but maybe not for others. But I believe there is a middle ground that we can all agree on which goes a bit deeper than pink, dinners, travel, social media reels and surface level self care.

Angair Biong by Ekua King for Elle UK Magazine October 2022

For me personally, pregnancy forced me further into some what of my soft girl szn. I realized that being pregnant is such a delicate time in a woman’s life. So many changes. I’ve seen my body grow in ways I’ve never seen before. I gained 30lbs. My feet swell. My emotions can sometimes be in a battle of what I should and shouldn’t react to. Let’s not mention that I walk like a cowboy now simply because my baby is growing and dropping everyday. But even deeper, in the first trimesters I had to be careful and aware of myself because that timeframe is when miscarriage is highest.

And as time went on you just have to be mindful of preterm birth and the fact that pregnancy is a near death experience.

I’ve had to say no to more people than one. And I’ve had to let my husband treat me even more like a flower and allow him to learn how to be more gentle. Lastly, I definitely am continuing to evolve into who God created me to be with casting off the pressures of the world.

But I realized that this is something I’ve been working towards a long time, specifically since giving my life to Christ.

I began to realize my worth and delicacy as a woman. I believe that upon understanding the value of you and the person who set your value, the creator, God; you automatically have to start digging into what we probably should call “Soft Girl Life.” It shouldn’t be simply for a szn that we choose to place a premium on how we value ourselves and it’s more than money can buy.

More than the trips you can experience, but I believe it’s coming into know the intrinsic value of being a daughter in Christ, not working so hard in your own strength and coming into perfect alignment with the privileges of being an heir.

I literally think of Paris Hilton when I said that.

Granted, not everything we saw from her was perfect but my home girl was the epitome of resting in what it was to be an heir. No, she was not about to do things in her own strength. “Daddy will pay for that.” She knew she was cute and she did what intrinsically made her happy.

Paris was that girl because she was a carefree heir. I’m looking at God that way now.

When you find that value in Christ, you begin to shift from Soft Girl Szn/life to Joint Heir Life. Virtuous Woman life. A Child of God frame of reference.

We extend a bit more grace. We exemplify humility. We give more mercy. We walk in our delicacy but also the light that beams on the inside of us. I think softness and gentleness is a beautiful attribute of our Father.

I believe we may even say that it’s not so much about cutting people off but allowing the process of love to smooth our rough edges. To exemplify love to those used to being cut off; To operate in this beautiful feminine poise that God only gave women. But at the same time, it’s about exercising boundaries. It’s all of that to me.

I asked a couple of my girls what Soft Girl Szn meant to them and here’s what they said:

Aaliyah: hairstylist, entrepreneur, worship leader, skater and more. 

“Slowing down. Definitely taking time out for yourself. Sometimes you’re moving too fast. And all of our life we’ve learned to be hard and rough but I believe soft girl szn means to take the time out to be yourself and love on yourself. To be gentle. It’s important to be gentle especially if you desire to be a wife because you can’t be hard and rough and it could be taken as masculine. And it can be bad for your relationship status. I believe it’s taking time and slowing down. Being gentle and loving yourself.”

Jasmine Ayo: creative, alternative, entrepreneur and more.

“From the little I gathered, it’s kind of a luxury life for black women. But more so the luxury to be human & express emotions in safe outlets since we aren’t really guaranteed that. The luxury side includes pampering & being taken care of through dates, traveling, debt free, lingerie etc. I personally don’t use it because most of it is a façade to me. And many women trying to live that lifestyle are doing so at the cost of debt & approval.”

Charity Brown: Content Creator, Youtuber, God’s Princess and more:


“Soft girl season to me means resting in the reality of God’s sovereignty in my life. I’ve never understood what it meant when people said “the safest place to be is in the will of God.” And now I understand. Because I’m His, because my foundation is in Him, because He is my father, and the Lord of my life not only can I rest in my femininity but I can truly walk in my identity as God’s princess in boldness and fearlessness.”

Blaze: Vintage Connoisseur, Entrepreneur, content creator, Worshiper, Mom, hairstylist, and more.

“When I hear soft girl season, or (era) it translates to me as a temporary stepping down from masculinity. As if this person previously lived a life that did not allow them to embrace their vulnerability or the aspects of their make up and character that makes them different from men(women). I know it’s trending now, but it has always translated to me this way and presents many questions, like what were you like before then? Were you unsafe to tap into this side of yourself? And does this translate just to the fact your dressing more girly now??? Why.. what made you unsafe to find the balance between your femininity & masculinity.”

Shaire Junyte: Illustrator, Gamer, Anime Fan, Cartoon watcher, worshiper, and more:

“Allowing yourself to be sensitive. Allowing help from others and showing up for yourself more everyday.”

Marley: Actress, Model, Mom, Singer, Wife, Entrepreneur, Author and more:

“Nothing, it’s a new trend that came about. Okay I’ll cooperate. *slight laughter* It’s basically like self care, bubble baths, candles, going out, doing what you desire for yourself. Tuning into your femininity whether that means changing your wardrobe, cutting off a relationship. That’s what it really means. Putting you first. “I GOTTA PUT ME FIRST LUSCIOUS.” That’s what it is. But when you say what it means to me, it doesn’t mean anything to me because, you know…I just be chilling and working on me regardless so…When I said soft girl szn is just a trend that came about is because there’s a new phrase and new terminology rather for something that I’ve been practicing. So that’s that.”

I so appreciated the honesty and perspectives of these ladies.

I think a common ground we can all come to is “Soft Girl Szn” is a trend but the nature of it is to be in touch with who you are as a woman, putting a premium on your worth and diving deep into the peace, identity and reliance that you have in God.

If you are currently looking for a way out of darkness. Jesus is waiting for you with open arms. “For whoever calls on the name of the LORD shall be saved” (Romans 10:13 NKJV).

Say this prayer, confess it with your mouth and believe it with your heart and you will be saved: Lord Jesus, I confess my sins and ask for your forgiveness. Please come into my heart as my Lord and Savior. Take complete control of my life and help me to walk in Your footsteps daily by the power of the Holy Spirit. Thank you Lord for saving me and for answering my prayer.

Author: Nave SizonFounder of - I'm a Child of God simply trying to show people the love of God in many ways. I want people to see that God cannot be boxed in and that He is so multifaceted. Jesus is my Savior and I will continue to make his name famous in the earth.

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Author: Nave SizonFounder of - I'm a Child of God simply trying to show people the love of God in many ways. I want people to see that God cannot be boxed in and that He is so multifaceted. Jesus is my Savior and I will continue to make his name famous in the earth.